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Dear Dad
by
Alisha Morgan
Dear Dad,
There are many people who have influenced me in
my life so far, but none of them have been like
you. You are the
only influential person who has taught me about the
type of person I never want to be. Drinking, doing
drugs,
and treating people badly are things I will never
do because of you. I refuse to grow up and get an education,
only to throw away my life. The three articles I
have just stated are a few of the many issues you
have taught me
to overcome. I know you may think that the words
I've written so far are false, or that I've been
forced to write
these things by my mom, but you're too far gone to
realize the situation between the two of us; to
know how I've
been affected by your example. I just want you to
know that your words never encouraged me to condemn
these
things; your actions were the only examples I
needed.
I will never drink, smoke, or do drugs because of
your awesome illustration. I have had first hand
experience of
how these substances can screw up a person's life,
just by observing you. Your drinking made you a
person I
hated, still hate actually. Inhaling your cigarette
smoke in a second hand fashion made me sick; you
know that is
the reason I had bronchitis so bad and so often.
Knowing that you were high while I was in your care
scared me.
I know what the consumption of these substances
will do to one's body; just looking at you will
give anyone
enough evidence of the terrible things they do. You
are fifty years old and you have already received
your death
sentence.
When I was in the fifth grade, mama and I found
out that you had Hepatitis C, and that your refusal
to end all alcoholic consumption only made your
illness worse. At the same time, I found out how
you contracted
your disease. Shooting up was the answer and it
made me sick to my stomach to think that you liked
to harass
your body with needles and illegal drugs. It seems
you were never concerned about cleaning your
needles, just
the high you received from cocaine, crystal meth,
and the other countless drugs you took. You are the
best
person to find out how drugs affect your body,
since all one has to do is observe your physical
state. A yellowish
tint to your skin; a stomach that pooches out because of your failing liver; and a reeking odor
seeping through
your pores. I need no other examples, although you
do offer them, to persuade me against the evils of alcohol and
illegal drugs.
How else have you influenced me? I can easily
answer the question with this response: By not
mentally abusing
anyone. You and I both know why this is something I
don't want to ever find myself doing, but I will
explain my
point anyway. When you lived with me and mama, you
constantly badgered us with the ridiculous things
you did
or said. You knew that the two of us had short
tempers. You did everything that you could to set
them off. I
remember that the summer of 2000 was the worst
time, mentally, that I had while living with you.
Two or three
times a day, you and I would argue with one another
over the slightest comment or look.
These arguments
did
nothing but upset me and give you an excuse to
leave the house. I constantly had to take a walk
down the road,
just so that I could calm down and keep my anger in
check. I have always been a violent and angry
person, which
you had first hand experience with the day I used
you as my personal punching bag. I was so angry at
the way
you treated your family, how you caused turmoil
between the three of us, and the way in which you
treated
yourself. There was no respect, there never will
be, between you and I. The way that you treated me
and mama
was so unbearable that I was on the point of moving
out. Words do hurt, and I try not to use them
negatively the
way you did.
In the end, the main thing you have taught me to
cherish is my life. I've seen the way you treat
yours, like it's a gift
that can be replaced. I know that life is a gift,
but once it's gone, that's it. I refuse to throw
away my gift, the way
you have. I do not want to end up a dying woman,
all alone, with people who only congregate around me
when my
check comes in the mail. I want to choose against
the decision of cursing my boss out, almost losing
my job
because of it, the way you did (all because of your
drinking problem). I want my friends to enjoy my
company, not
disconnect themselves from me because my
personality was effected, in a negative way, by
illegal substances.
The most important thing that I never want to encounter, the way you have, is to have my own children hate me because of the way I have treated them; I want them to enjoy my company. I would like to thank you for your impeccable influence upon me. I have to say, you have made my life better for it.
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