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WorldCom’s Woes
Reminiscent of a Three Stooges Routine
by
Gregory J. Rummo
When one thinks of the phrase, “The Buck
Stops Here,” it’s President Harry Truman who comes to mind. The buck to which he
referred is a slang word for the counter passed from one poker player to another
to indicate whose turn it is to deal the cards.
President Bush spoke earlier this week on
Wall Street, expressing similar buck-stopping sentiments to the CEOs in
corporate America. Only the bucks he was talking about are the ones you carry
around in your wallet. And if you were an investor in Enron or WorldCom or
Global Crossing or Merck, to name a few - you have less of them these days.
While the president was proposing longer
jail time for corporate financial fudgers, WorldCom executives, amid Fifth
Amendment invocations, were blaming their auditors for their financial woes.
Bert Roberts, the chairman of WorldCom, blamed Melvin Dick, the Arthur Andersen
partner for failing to uncover the firms accounting irregularities. Let’s throw
in Jack Grubman, the Salomon Smith Barney analyst who hyped WorldCom’s stock to
the unsuspecting hoi polloi, and we’ve got the financial equivalent of Moe,
Larry and Curly.
Well, whose fault was it anyway, chowder
head?
Like the Three Stooges, all three should
shoulder the blame.
An accounting firm audits the work of its
clients it doesn’t author that work. Like the computer adage, “garbage in equals
garbage out,” the job of the auditor is to provide a professional critique of
the financial statements that have been provided by the firm it is being paid to
audit. If the auditor is also acting as a consultant to its client - most
accounting firms do - that is yet another conflict of interest.
As the CEO of a small, privately owned
company, I am familiar with this process. Once a year we have an outside
accounting firm come in and audit our books. It’s not only a requirement of our
two lenders, but three of the four share holders are located 12,500 miles away
on the other side of the globe in Hong Kong. They are entitled to have an
opinion about the company’s financial position other than what our own
accounting department gives to them on a monthly basis.
When my bookkeeper presents me with the
company’s income statement at the end of the month, I can look at the bottom
line and immediately tell if it’s a reasonable number based on my expectations
from the ebb and flow of the business over the prior four weeks.
It’s no big deal, really. It’s my job to
have my finger on the pulse of our business. And WorldCom’s former CEO, Bernhard
Ebbers, should have had his finger on the pulse of his business.
When the accountants come in at the end of
the year, we present them with our own, internally generated year-end statements
along with a tome of supporting documentation, which they then pore over for the
better part of a week.
There’s no way we can make up the numbers
here and expect to get away with it. Every dollar must be accounted for. Debits
must match credits in the exact science of accounting.
At the end of the week, I sit down with the
number crunchers and we have a wrap-up discussion. If the auditors have managed
to find some unpleasant surprises, there might be some wiggle room, some give
and take.
This is what President Bush meant when
asked by reporters at a news conference about his decades-old involvement as an
oil-company director. The President replied, “Sometimes things aren’t exactly
black and white.”
But in WorldCom’s case, black became white
when it should have been all red.
The rules dictating generally accepted
accounting practices weren’t just tweaked or bent, they were clearly broken.
Executives managed to convince their
auditors that it was okay to capitalize almost $4 billion in expenses. To put it
simply, WorldCom spent $4 billion and attempted to convince everyone that it
really didn’t spend $4 billion.
And somehow, incomprehensibly, their
auditors went along with this charade while stock analysts continued
recommending shares of the company to the rest of us poor suckers.
I can almost hear the boardroom discussions
now from high atop WorldCom’s plush headquarters.
The chairman, a man dressed impeccably in a
white shirt, red power tie and a blue pin stripe suit, clears his throat and
speaks in a soft yet steely voice. “Alright, which one of you knuckleheads is
responsible?”
“HE DID IT!!” Comes the chorus of replies
in unison from the group of finger pointing executives seated around the long,
well-polished mahogany table.
You get the picture?
Unfortunately, no one’s going “nyuk, nyuk,
nyuk, nyuk.”
Gregory J. Rummo is a syndicated columnist and author of “The View from
the Grass Roots,” published in July, 2002 by American-Book. You may order an
autographed copy from his website www.GregRummo.com by clicking on the
banner below. You may e-mail the author at GregoryJRummo@aol.com
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