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Superfluous
by
John S. Albanes
Josh Miller, 30, waved good-bye to his wife, Harriet, and three-year-old
daughter, Maggie, as he boarded flight 117 from JFK to Atlanta. The conference
in Atlanta would be his first since his promotion to division director at Comm
USA, one of New York's many communications firms. It would also be his first
time flying, the fear of which overtook him as he stepped through the wide aisle
of the 747.
Josh never talked about his fear. It had always brooded inside him, waiting to
be released until the time was right. He did not kid himself, however. Flight
was a necessity these days, not in the least for an employee at a communications
firm. But at his core he felt unease about putting his life in danger. Harriet's
cancer had relapsed, and Maggie, without a stable mother to take care of her,
would soon need a sitter. Surgery, sitter...
Money. Josh's hands gripped his armrests in tight disquietude as the plane
detached from the airport gate.
He then rubbed his face, mashing his cheeks together and squeezing some tension
out of his pores. How he wished he could be on the ground at that moment, safe
from risk. What if there were a malfunction? What if the turbulence was so
violent that it threw the plan into a nosedive? What about terrorists? The
captain's voice did sound Middle Eastern.
Josh watched the luggage cars float across the terminal as the behemoth moved
into position on the runway. Its engines roared. And for just a moment, as the
din filled the cabin, Josh felt nothing but suspended hope--as if the plane was
not going to take off after all. He thought about his family, about God, about
life and death, about pain, the pain of dying in midair, while everything around
him became overshadowed by a fury propelling him suddenly forward, forcing his
back to his seat. He was dizzy; everything was. He felt blood trickle down his
lips and chin as his breath left him, sucked from his lungs as if by the jets
themselves. He looked outside his window and vertigo took control, sending him
unconscious.
....
He woke up and barely blinked an eye before he saw the cabin explode into
flames. Josh thought only that he was to die.
They all assumed he was brave in his last moments, as was assumed of everyone
aboard the flight. And the firm thought of him fondly, and established an annual
day of remembrance in his name. And his parents held each other wistfully after
receiving the call from Harriet, and they, too, must have thought he had been
brave through it all.
And the pastor spoke at his wake solemnly, "Simple is a man's life when weighed
against God's force, and great his fear when he realizes this truth." Harriet
cried and dreamed he was still alive.
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