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500 X 161 Sitting

 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    - The Writers Voice - Forum Index -> "The 500 Words Project -- Flash Fiction"
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shadowlight
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PostPosted: Mon Jan 04, 2010 3:31 pm    Post subject: 500 X 161 Sitting Reply with quote



Happy New Year, everyone. I hope you had a blessed and joyful Christmas and that 2010 brings you every happineess. Here's the first prompt for the year. Sorry it's taken me so long. I hope you enjoy and I can't wait to see what you come up with.

I got the image is from Vinny over at Multiply. I'm not sure where she got it, maybe from photobucket. Have fun.

shadowlight

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Harry
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 06, 2010 9:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Grandma’s BMW

Harry Buschman


Halfway to Grandma’s house Alice sat down with her back to a large tree and looked at the last cookie. She was on her way with a basket of food her mother gave her, and little by little she’d eaten everything. Except for the last cookie.

It wasn’t her fault. She was preoccupied. You know how it is when your mind is far away ... it helps to eat. Anyway, it was that way with little Alice. She wanted a Mini-Cooper so bad she could taste it. Her friend Ella had a MG coupe and little Alice knew she could blow the doors off an MG with the tomato-red Mini-Cooper she saw in the show room last week.

But it was $26,650 and all she had was 700 dollars, and that’s why she had eaten everything in her Grandmother’s basket, except this last cookie – thinking about how she was going to come up with 26,000 bucks.

She could hear it before she could see it. It was definitely a BMW – that extraordinary throaty rasp when the foot comes back down hard on the throttle and the front end rises a little. Sure enough, she could see a blue convertible coming up fast, raising a cloud of dust and weaving side to side on the narrow dirt road. At the last minute all four wheels locked and it stopped sideways in the road in front of her.

It was Alice’s grandma! “Law’s’a’mighty,” she declared, “ain’t this a hot one.”

Alice ran to the car. “Granny, are you all right? What are you doin’ in that car?”

“Bought it little girl. Red hot piece’a machinery the man said – reminds me a little of your grandfather, starts off with a bang and the next y’know y’find him asleep in the barn.”

“But it must’a cost ...”

“A hunnert and five thousand sweetie. Ain’t that a hoot?”

“But...”

“Sold the house, the barn and the whole damn back 40 acres, girl. Sick of livin’ alone, sick of watchin’ the sun go down. Gonna kick out the cat and move these old bones into town.” She opened the passenger door. “Throw that cookie away and git in little girl, let’s look fer a place in the city where everything’s open all night.”
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shadowlight
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 1:03 pm    Post subject: A Gift Discovered (WC 500) Reply with quote

Sorry it took me so long to post. It's been hectic here. Wink Thanks for taking a look.

shadowlight



A Gift Discovered
© Marlicia Fernandez (WC 500) 1-14-10


Erica pushed her hair from her eyes and kept walking. It seemed like she’d been walking forever. Cold seeped through her. “I’m tired,” she whispered. “I want to go home.”

Some kind of animal scurried through the underbrush, but no one answered, not even the fabled wood nymphs. She straightened her shoulders and looked for an animal path. Her parents always said that if she found herself lost in the woods she should either stay put or try to find an animal path because it would lead to a stream or river. If she followed it toward the setting sun it would take her home.

“But how can the river help if I don’t know where I am? How will anyone find me?” Her vision blurred and she blinked it clear. Her brothers always said crying never solved anything. She wouldn’t cry. She would make her brothers proud.

Cold pricklies crawled along her skin. Had anyone miss her? Did anyone even know she was gone? She’d been playing with her baby brother in the garden, waiting to be called in for the midday meal and when… Erica shuddered. She didn’t understand what happened then. All she knew was something had brought her to these woods. Alone. Something that made the air look blurry and filled everything with bright colors before fading away.

Erica straightened her shoulders and pulled her sweater tight. She slowed her steps and studied her surroundings. There had to be a path. But it was hard to see. Majestic evergreens towered over her. And great broadleaf trees beginning to change into their colorful red, gold, yellow, orange and purple clothes. Trees so tall they blocked out the sunlight. And the warmth. Shadows stretched out everywhere. Branches, twigs and evergreen needles covered everything. Erica shivered and hugged herself. “Why am I here?”

Somewhere in the trees a bird whistled. Another responded. Erica caught a glimpse of squirrels jumping from branch to branch, their cheeks bulging with nuts, or whatever it was they were taking from the trees. The thought of food made her stomach rumble. Maybe I can find something to eat while I walk. Like the squirrels. Maybe they will share.

She stumbled forward, kicking dry leaves ahead of her as she walked. Were they from the last Harvest Season? Could fallen leaves last that long?

A large yellow-orange leaf floated from one of the broadleaf trees mingling with the evergreens. Erica caught it before it hit the ground. If felt soft and smooth, not like those that crunched beneath her feet as she walked. And it wasn’t cold, or even cool to touch. It was warm. Like the fire in the hearth at home.

Home.

Tears slid down her cheek. Erica rubbed the leaf against her cheek. “All I want is to go home.”

The air shimmered. Everything looked watery. Color surrounded her. Disappeared. Something hard pressed against her back. A tree. A family farm stretched out in front of her. Her farm. She was home.

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shadowlight
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 1:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh, wow, Harry. What can I say about this. I wish I had thought of it. It's great. Alice's grandmother is a hoot. "Let's look fer a place in the city where everything is open all night", indeed. LOL Too funny. Loved the bit about kicking out the cat too. My husband would appreciate that. Well done, my friend.

shadowlight

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Harry
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 2:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Didn't expect the happy ending, Marlicia, but grateful for it anyway. I hate to see little girls cry. You painted an elegant picture of the forest, it was as good as I've seen in a long time. Erica's 'senior moment' with her baby brother was another surprise. Color seems to be hehind it all ... very pleasant interlude, Marlicia.
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Heidi
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 19, 2010 12:34 pm    Post subject: cool Reply with quote

I just finished reading both of those. Harry you covered what I wanted to say about Marlica's story. Well mostly, I did love way you described things without describing them too much. And Marlica you said everything I wanted to say about Harry's story. Darn, now what do I say? Well I think you did a good job of putting a modern spin on something that I would have instantly thought fairy tale.

*Note:I guess everything isn't the right word but you both summed up each others work so well that I didn't have much to say Laughing
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Harry
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 19, 2010 2:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

A pleasure to see you here again Heidi. Thank you from both of us, and doesn't it make you want to try your hand at it again?
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Heidi
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 20, 2010 9:35 am    Post subject: writing Reply with quote

Yes, it does, usually I can think of something to respond with when I see these pictures...I'm trying to think of something that's not fantasy based since I figure that's the normal response, well not that the previous ones were abnormal Laughing. Currently I am working on re-editing the story I told some of you about that I wrote in high school. It's bad but I hope that I can make it better with some major re-editing.
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shadowlight
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PostPosted: Sat Jan 23, 2010 11:16 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Harry,

I'm glad you liked the happy ending. Every once in a while I like to throw you a curve ball. Wink Thank you very much for reading and for your kind words. They are much appreciated, as always.

Heidi,

It's good to see you back and I look forward to seeing more of your work here on the Voice. What is the novel you are editing about?

Thank you for taking the time to read and comment on my little snippet. I'm glad you enjoyed it. That makes me happy. Care to take a stab at it yourself? Wink We'd love to see what you come up with.

shadowlight

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Heidi
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 24, 2010 12:22 pm    Post subject: story Reply with quote

I would love to think of something for this one. Unfortunately unless I think of something today I probably won't post it this week. I'm going to be very busy w/two new jobs/internships and my other pt job. As for the story I'm editing look under Kimberly Canyon in the authors index. It's that one, I'm hoping to make it a little better. Right now I'm just doing a straight dialogue edit and possibly fixing major plot holes. Then once it's retyped (it's not saved on my computer Sad ) I'll do even more editing to try and make it less cliched.
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shadowlight
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 27, 2010 9:12 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It sounds like you're keeping really busy, Heidi. Good for you.Thanks for the information about the story. I'll try to take a look at it as soon as I can grab a little spare time. In the meantime, join us whenver you can and good luck with your jobs and internships.

shadowlight

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Heidi
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PostPosted: Fri Feb 05, 2010 10:10 pm    Post subject: my story Reply with quote

Okay here is my take on it. This is just an idea so it may be crap, but oh well.

Contemplation
By Heidi Yang

A young boy sat under a sprawling oak tree. It was springtime now, so the leaves were in full bloom, the wood glossy and healthy. The boy was thinking about his life so far. Granted it was a short one (at least for now.) He felt himself drifting off, suddenly he was awakened by a bird's call. 'Man, I wonder what time it is.' he thought as he stretched and looked around. He glanced at his watch, it was already four?! "I've been out here way too long." he said as he got up, dusting his clothes off. "My parents are probably wondering where I went." He started to walk back home along the dirt path he had taken here. Not long after he heard his mom, "Hey, where are you?" her voice echoed down the long corridor of trees.
"I'm right here mom." he said smiling.
"Oh, goodness where have you been?!"
"I went out for a walk, I guess I got sleepy." he replied. "Sorry if I worried you."
"Well, just don't do that again." his mom said sternly. "Now go wash up for dinner, your father is going to be home soon."
"Now?" he asked. "But it's kind of early for dinner isn't it?"
"I'm not done making it yet!" his mother replied. "If you're going to be so snappy then you can help me make it."
"Okay, fine." he sighed and went to the bathroom to wash his hands. Then he went to his room and put his coat on the bed, he smoothed his blond hair out of his face. 'Well so much for a quiet evening, I guess my life is pretty good, I don't know why I ever thought it wasn't.' the boy smiled and hurried towards the kitchen as his mom cried, "Hey, what are you doing in there?! Hurry up and come help me already!"
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Harry
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PostPosted: Sat Feb 06, 2010 5:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Good to share this part of the "Voice" with you again, Heidi. I liked your 'matter-of-fact' approach to the subject. A boy, brought back to reality by the chore of helping his mother make dinner. I am often guilty of taking a prompt and using it as a springboard to launch myself into an expression of my own personal panic attacks.
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shadowlight
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PostPosted: Sat Feb 06, 2010 10:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Heidi,

I really enjoyed your take on this prompt. It rings so true on a fundamental level. Everyone can relate to this boy and his situation. Well done! (And welcome back. Wink )

shadowlight

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Heidi
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PostPosted: Sat Feb 06, 2010 4:44 pm    Post subject: thanks Reply with quote

Thanks for the warm welcome guys! I had some free time late last night. I was going to give the boy a name (probably David) but then I thought why not run w/the idea of an anonymous character? So I did, I suppose I could have made it a bit better but oh well. I almost turned him from young to old by accident Laughing I've been editing An Interesting Idea so much that the young adult characters stay w/me a bit too much sometimes Laughing
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