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shadowlight
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 07, 2010 7:20 am    Post subject: 500 X 176 White Reply with quote


Hi all. Here's the next prompt. I look forward to seeing what you come up with for it. I got the image in an e-mail notification from my writing friend, Vinny. It is on her Multiply Site, found here: http://vinnyandflask.multiply.com/journal/item/1520
Have fun!

shadowlight

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Harry
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 9:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The White Peacock

Harry Buschman


Father had an annoying habit of pulling on his mustache whenever something troubled him. He was doing that now as he stood by the living room window looking out across our ragged lawn. It was early April, a chilly evening, and spring was a little late that year.

"Your sister is out there, Ben. Maybe you better go get her ... it'll be supper time before long and we won't know where she is." I walked over to him and looked over his shoulder. "She shouldn't be dressed like that. She'll catch her death of cold. Hurry Ben ... first thing you know she'll be out the gate and up the street,"

"We have to make a decision, Pop. She's getting worse every day." I turned and got my coat from the hook on the vestibule wall. "She's slippery as an eel ... she's out before you can catch her. 'specially now that spring is here."

He turned to watch me getting into my coat. "No decisions, you hear? Your mother won't hear of it." He turned his back to me and looked out the window again. "Just go get her ... please."

I caught up with her at the gate. Another second and she would have been out in the street ... in that crazy costume. The white peacock! She wore it in the play back in high school ... she was going steady with Richard back then. "C'mon Sis, it's almost supper time. You have to come in now."

"Richard will be along any minute. I want to see him first ... to see if he remembers."

"He's dead, Sis – remember? We buried him a year ago. Try to remember."

"How can you say such a thing? He's just late from work ... he'll be here any minute ... I want to be here when he gets here. I don't want supper ... not until Richard gets home."

She won't accept it. Even though she saw his flag draped casket lowered in a narrow plot in Arlington Cemetery, she still waits for him every night. She makes Mom set a place for him at the table. I can hear her talking to him in her room at night. Mom and Pop say she'll come around in time, be patient they say ... let's not do anything hasty.

The cold evening air is ruffling her feathers and I can feel her tremble. She reluctantly gives up her vigil at the garden gate and lets me steer her back to the house, all the while looking back to see if Richard is there.
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shadowlight
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 13, 2010 11:24 am    Post subject: The White Peacock (WC 500) Reply with quote

Hi everyone,

Here I am, finally. Wink Freewrite, but I'm just happy to be getting some original material written. I guess edits work a different part of the brain, LOL. Anyway, thanks for taking a look.

God bless,
shadowlight
with God all things are possible



The White Peacock
© Marlicia Fernandez 9-13-10 (WC 500)


Birdsong floated on the faint breeze between the scattered stands of trees--cheery music to match the warm, cloudless sky. The brilliant blue flowers of the garden filled the air with sweetness and a serenity Tara desperately needed.

She loved it here. Or at least she used to. If filled her with awe and joy. Kalan loved it too. Loved the colorful blooms and the exotic animals that would parade across the paths unexpectedly. He’d grin the crooked grin and say he envied those animals, felt more at home with them then with people. “Animals,” he’d say, “aren’t afraid to be themselves. To be as subdued or as ostentatious as they pleased without worrying about what others think or how it might affect their reputation of the current job.

Tara sighed. Kalan had always been one to preen. Being the center of attention was at the core of his personality. Heaven help them if he walked into a room and he wasn’t the focus of all eyes. The topic of all conversations. He wouldn’t stand for it. Not for a minute. Unless it suited his purpose. And that had been his undoing.

“Tara? You are leaking.”

A quick brush of her fingers swept the traitorous tears from her cheeks. Miskle noticed far too much for her liking. “It’s nothing.”

“Isn’t it?” Miskle inclined his head, his gaze sweeping across the gardens spreading out around them. “Don’t waste your tears. Kalan is not gone.”

“Isn’t he?” She sighed. “You saw him fall. So did I. He couldn’t have survived. Not this time.”

Miskel glanced at her. “Why do you give up hope so easily? His body was never found.”

“Yes it was. You saw it.”

“We saw a body.” He strode forward, forcing Tara to hustle if she didn’t want to be left behind. “It was not Kalan’s body.”

She jogged to match Miskel’s long strides. “What? How can you be sure?”

“I can’t be.” He slowed his steps to allow Tara to proceed at a more comfortable pace. “But you can.”

“What?” Tara narrowed her eyes. “How?”

“Think.” He sighed and swept his arm around to encompass their surroundings. “Do you not know why I brought you here?”

“I … You like flowers?” She shrugged. “I don’t know. You’ve never much cared for this place before. I’m the one who likes it.” Her voice fell to a whisper. “And Kalan. He liked it here too. What’s your point?”

He put his hands on her shoulders and gave her a little shake. “You can’t have forgotten.”

She shoved his hands away. “Let’s say I have. Enlighten me.”

“Oh, for the love of…” Miskel rolled his eyes. “Kalan always said if he had to disappear he’d get word to you. Here.”

“That’s right.” Tara sprinted toward the north end of the gardens. There, amidst the blue flowers white peacock preened. That had to be her message. Her fingers closed around the pendant Kalan had given her months ago—a preening white peacock.

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shadowlight
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 13, 2010 11:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Harry,

This one made me want to cry. It's so realistic. I felt for the poor girl and her family. I wonder if she will indeed come around or if the reality is too painful for her ever to face. Really well-written piece, my friend.

God bless,
marlicia
with God all things are possible

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Harry
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 13, 2010 12:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

There's a larger story here. One that means a great deal to you. I wish I knew these people, Marlicia. They seem like a fun group. Kalan and Tara and Miskel ... materializing and dematerializing at the drop of a hat. Well that's me I guess. I live in the material world ... for now.
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shadowlight
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 15, 2010 2:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You could be right, Harry. I'm just not sure what it is. As soon as they tell me what's going on, I'll let you know. (I'm glad you'd like to know them. They're quite pleased at that, LOL.)

Oh, I before I forget, I want to let you know that I will be away from my computer for the next few days since I'll be on my annual retreat. I'll try to post an image before the retreat begins, but if I can't I'll do so when I return.

God bless,
Marlicia
with God all things are possible

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Heidi
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 27, 2010 8:40 am    Post subject: stories Reply with quote

I just finished reading everyone's stories. I really liked yours Marlicia I felt like I was there with the characters, I think it would be something that could work as a longer story. Harry yours was good as always, I actually felt bad for your characters. I'd like to think she comes around eventually but who knows?
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shadowlight
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PostPosted: Sat Oct 02, 2010 7:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Heidi,

I'm sorry it has taken me so long to get back to you. Things have been busy. Wink Thank you very much for taking the time to read and to comment on this for me. You know how much I appreciate it. It makes me happy that you think there could be more to this. (I'll have to put it aside for later.) So thank you for your encouragement.

I hope we'll soon see something from you...when you can find a little time. We've missed your writing here.

God bless,
shadowlight
with God all things are possible

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Heidi
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 9:59 am    Post subject: my prompt Reply with quote

Remembrance
By Heidi Yang

Diane sighed, she was supposed to be walking back to Darrin's house but she wanted to walk past the garden again. Beside her a big golden retriever strained at his leash. "What now? Did you see some tissues again?" Diane asked the dog. Darrin was out of town and had just gotten back, leaving her in charge of his dog and his house for a week. "I'm glad he's back, I'm tired of walking you." Diane mumbled to Tucker as he picked up a white piece of tissue. She didn't even bother to make him drop it, already lost in her own thoughts again. She stopped as they came upon the garden. The flowers were so pretty, blue, red and white almost like a flag. Diane thought of the time that she and her boyfriend Brian had seen a white peacock there. It was so strange to see something like that in the middle of a public park. Not only a peacock but a white one. They learned later it had escaped from the zoo. Sitting on a gray stone bench near the flowers Diane smiled as she remembered how excited they had both been. Tucker glanced up at her, hoping for some sort of treat. Diane laughed at him as she got up from the bench. "Okay let's go back Tucker." she said.
After a few more blocks they reached Darrin's house. She opened the back door and unhooked Tucker from his leash. "Hey what took you guys so long?" Darrin asked as he petted Tucker.
"Oh I just wanted to walk by the garden again."
"I see, isn't that the fifth time this month?"
"Possibly, why, does it matter?"
"Well no, it's just, it's been two years already Diane."
"I know, it doesn't hurt to remember happy things does it?"
"No but it's time to move on don't you think?"
"Well I wouldn't put it that way but yes I think you're right, it is."
"Besides you do have this." Darrin said as he handed her a picture of a white peacock. Diane smiled. "Yes I suppose I do."
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Harry
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 27, 2010 1:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

A sad little story, Heidi. I get the feeling it means something personal to you. The two men, am I right? Brian and Darrin ... one seems to be taking the place of the other. The gist of it stuck in my mind all evening ...
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Heidi
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 28, 2010 1:40 pm    Post subject: your comments Reply with quote

Thanks for your comments Harry. I had been mulling over what to write for this prompt for awhile. I'm glad that it was memorable for you! You're right it does have some personal meaning for me. I based the dog on our family dog as well. He's a huge golden retriever who will eat anything including tissues! Anyway I'm glad you liked it hope you have a good Halloween.
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shadowlight
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PostPosted: Thu Nov 11, 2010 9:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi, Heidi,

I'm sorry it has taken me so long to comment on this. I've been sort of snowed under over here, among other things. This is a sweet little piece, with a bit of sadness thrown in for good measure. Darin seems like a patient sort and I like the way you tied in the white peacock. The dog made me smile. Very realistic. Thanks for sharing. I hope to see more of your work soon.

God bless,
shadowlight
with God all things are possible

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