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Ad: Brick Home for Sale in Winter Wonderland!

 
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dkneip
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Joined: 01 Jul 2004
Posts: 253
Location: California

PostPosted: Thu Dec 02, 2004 8:38 pm    Post subject: Ad: Brick Home for Sale in Winter Wonderland! Reply with quote

Pat Strobbler was the premiere real estate agent in her posh community. A pure saleswoman from tip to toe with potential beyond imagination! So her decision to move to the North Pole to practice her craft was actually quite foolish. Everyone knows that elves live in the trees - and trees can't be sold. Reindeer live in caves, unless one should possess the gift of flight and then it lives in a wooden stable covered by a tarp. And the only ones with a house on the entire Pole were the Clauses.

Then wasn't it amazing when Pat actually convinced them to put their home on the market?
by dkneip

In fact, what did they have to lose? There wasn't a buyer within a thousand miles of them - and why not put your house up for sale if you know there's no one around to buy it? When jolly old Nick put the question to his wife, she just stirred the cookie batter and shook her head, and muttered to herself that the old coot was losing it.
by Harry

Of course, Dolores Claus was not as simple-minded as some people actually thought. "Believe me," she would snicker over her snickerdoodles, "I'm the real brains behind this whole "Santa" thing!" So the idea of putting the house on the market seemed very suspicious to her. She knew a couple of vengeful elves that had the ability to squirrel away tons of dough for a snowy day!
by dkneip

.... and the idea of elves taking over the neighborhood was more than she could stand. Dirty little beasts! This part of the world used to be so pleasant to live in, so white -- everybody was just like we were! Just the occasional Eskimo knocking on the back door asking if there were any odd jobs to do. It was all Father Claus's fault -- illegal aliens! Cheap labor so he could sell his shoddy gimcracks to Toys-R-Us cheaper than they could buy them elsewhere.
by Harry

The thoughts had dropped anchor in her mind, churning and whizzing all around. Her suspicions rose like cookie dough in a hot oven. And as she stood there in the kitchen, a mixing bowl wrapped tightly in her arms, batter crusting along the edge, there came upon the door a very curious and wonderful little knock!
by dkneip

When the door was swung open, there stood on the stoop four round-bellied chipmunks and Santa feared they were going to start carolling! Instead, the bravest of the group stepped forward and announced, with a burp, "We ate your 'for sale' sign. It was delicious."
whoever wants credit for this ending, contact me

The End


Last edited by dkneip on Mon Jan 03, 2005 5:44 pm; edited 6 times in total
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