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Bad King Jasper's Back


Rusty Broadspear

Bad King Jasper was feeding his family - to his dragon,

When a gigantic dragonfly buzzed his head,

So he battered this wire-bird with his cousin's leg,

Until the blessed thing was dead.

"There is no more food," he cried to his dragon,

"I must speak to my people and make them hear.

They must work for me until their bones snap,

For I am the King they all revere."

The dragon snorted a tiny blue flame, while outside

The Sun bobbled down behind dark hills.

Jasper prepared, with body piercing and orange hair,

To make a speech was his thrill of thrills.

The unwashed, diseased and interbred 

In thousands cheered their benevolent King,

He said he and his dragon were underfed

And the throng then did the weirdest thing.

One by one they fell at his feet

And yelled to Jasper, "We'll be your meat!!"

"Very well," said Jasper, and as if on cue,

He picked up a juicy one to make a meat stew.

It's hardly fair to call King Jasper bad,

He had a long distance guilt trip when he ate his Dad.

But Jasper reigned happily until whereupon

There were no people left - he'd ate everyone.

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