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The Wardrobe of A Church -- Chapter One


Tiffany Alfonso

Chapter One

As I approached Immaculate Conception Roman Catholic Church in Montclair, I was conjectured at the many vehicles parking in its lot for the Sunday service, along with its architectural features. Ah, what a chritudinous church, the most prized of all in this town, if not the most unusual in architecture in New Jersey. As I entered it the interior was mind-boggling as it provided resonance for the pipe organ and the choir doing an elated rendition of "Holy, Holy, Holy." A majestic complexion impacted me as the final chord played by the prodigious pipe organ fulminated gloriously.

The whole service ran through manageably, but I see some flaws in the dress code. I spotted a family of Montclair High School Mountie fans wear shorts, which were prohibited in church, even at this building's type of atmosphere. Also a group of students from the same school were out of place because they are wearing T-shirt about their interest, usually the ones offending Our Creator. A sordid faction of the worshippers were dressed in their Sunday merit, particularly pre-K girls who were bedecked in their pleated dresses with pouf sleeves, black dress shoes with buckles, and lace-trimmed socks. I was wondering, as I listened to the sermons, if they would have dressed more modestly, they would have been as cordial as those girls.

After the service, I told the imperfectly dressed worshippers to remain in the building for a lecture. As they remained in their pews, they sat as still as miniature statues. My lecture, so persuasive and eloquent, gives them the message about how to dress like a Catholic, but they slept, yawned, and stared into space while it proceeded.

"Brothers and sisters," I retorted, "did you not see what's wrong with you? Did you not perceive the garments you wear today are off limits in this church? Didn't you know that Our Creator has a time and place not to wear them? I, as a Catholic, could not bear this dilemma! I know what are you doing; you are breaking the..."

But my lecture abruptly concluded with comments from criticizing Montclair High students and they told me that this is too much. They told me that traditional church wardrobe was too flattering, if not banal and outdated. They also postulated that "this is for the rookies." I, on the other hand, knew that it has something to do with the third Commandment: to keep religious days modest to Our Creator. I left church when the criticizing warbled continuously, discontented and dismal.

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